Haunting Shadows

"definitely something there mate."~"They give off...sort of an...aura? Idk how to describe it, but you can tell."~"Not because we aren't compatible people, but because the circumstances are incompatible"~"I SAID TIME"~"it'll stick around for a while."

I've been given a gift of a high emotional metabolism. I get over things quickly, and it's something I treasure and love dearly about myself. Just yesterday my mind wasn't thinking completely straight, but today everything to the last detail feels different. I looked onto the world with sober eyes, and realized how ridiculously over dramatized hormones make life seem. I was finally able to sort the thoughts which the other day were completely scrambled, and noticed the ridiculousness and the simplicity of the situation. Girls, I am so sorry you have to deal with such a high amount of stress and feels in your day to day life, as it feels good to be able to clear the fog around me and see again! I almost feel embarrassed my past self, but I am grateful for the way things have turned out. I was getting hopelessly lost, and needed the slap to the face. As unintentional as it was, a smack is a smack, and it's sobering powers are not to be underestimated! Pizza has never be...

I got the feels. I had feels stronger than I've felt in a very long time, if ever. For a fleeting moment they have sprung up, and in a swift motion crushed out like a dropped cigarette with an army boot. The last strings of smoke weaving through the air, as I watched and more importantly felt them in a numb silence. And now, it feels like there was nothing to begin with, numbness lingering a while longer, a defense mechanism against the pain. And just like that, the feels were gone. Or were they?

Well this is now completely ridiculous. At first I thought of this as a fun experiment that I for some reason thought would end today, but today isn't the day! It's actually tomorrow. The surprising thing? I got genuinely disappointed. I just sort of sat there looking at my phone, and the screen that showed me my inability to send text messages. This insignificant nothing, a stretch of 24 hours is annoying me? What? Why? And yet it is, and it will be yet another day full of misses.. I should really start using my phone as a.... phone. Here is a picture of pikachu. It makes me happy.

I feel like in the past few months the only time I've really said much to anyone, it's been on these big stressful subjects. Like this shit just pours out of me, as it has nowhere else to go. Today it's about a girl, yesterday it was all about money, and tomorrow it will be the leader's role I have to take in my next school project, another heap of responsibility. I want to one day resolve all of my current problems, and finally come out from underneath the damn water to take a single gulp of air. It hasn't happened in so long. This is why we drink, and this is why we miss our childhood so very much.